myself

Stuck

I don’t even know what I want to write. It’s not like some words can change anything…
I don’t feel good generally. It’s like I’m not able to choose who I want to be or if I still want what I want..
I’m stuck on the same level where time or place doesn’t mean anything. Day after day I ask myself the same question..is this worth it ? I’m losing myself when I see how my desires and hopes are weaker every day.
I’m stuck and I can’t move.. I don’t know where should I go. As if nothing make sense and I just aimlessly experience day after day. My whole world is crumbling right before my eyes and I can’t do anything about it.
I just want to dissipate into the millions of tiny particles and float to the unknown destination. Fly away and never return..
I’m the dreamer kind of person who still hopes. Hopes for a better world and a better tomorrow. Hopes that one day we all wake up from this mistake which we live in.
My dreams are spectacular but my motivation is rapidly melting.
It never bothered me to go against the stream but I do not have enough energy.  I do not have energy..maybe I would if I have met somebody who is also trying to change something. It’s just too hard to be on your own, to fight every battle all alone…
After a while people just lose their dreams, hopes to believe in something better and so we let ourselves tear down with the stream and wash our brains..
I’m not done yet,  but I do not know whether my mindless ideas and dreams survive these powerful currents of life …